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Lullabies for Winter

by Tamara Dawn

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1.
Solstice Prayer Dhyanam, the sanskrit word for meditation. It can be broken down into two parts: Dhi and yana. The two root words mean simply to see clearly and to sacrifice, to offer back. So meditation then, dhyanama, is simply to see the truth and sacrifice everything else back into the ether. To live in that state, this is meditation. Sarve Bhavantu sukhinah Sarve santu niramayah Sarve Bhadrani pashyantu Ma Kashchid Duhka Bhag Bhavet Om Shanti Shanti Shantih: May all be happy, May all be without sickness, Slay the serpent, Inertia put to rest, May you not partake in the miseries, But share and behold, the auspicious eternal peace.
2.
Fated to Spiral Imagine a serpent, chasing its tail. Imagine a spiral, the shell of a snail. Imagine your heart, the centre of the Taurus. Imagine a note, as it sounds to the chorus. To protect your heart, is to assume. That God is malevolent, fated to doom. As one half contracts, the other half blooms. Cities rise and fall to ruins. Shall we freeze, stuck and afraid? Shall we fly, running away? Shall we fight, resisting the curve? Shall we fear the wolf and tether the herd? My heart is not a finite resource. My Love is not bothered by time. The waves of the world are boundless, The limits imposed by the mind. Just let me love you, this is my branch…. I open my eyes, I offer the trance. Sing with me softly, Love with me true. There’s nothing to stillness, it’s all that we do. And I reach not towards or away, for fated to spiral; I sway Fated to spiral; I sway
3.
Las Abejas 07:00
4.
What can I carve out for you with all that I am as a woman? So we can ride out the ebbs and the flows as the waters keep on falling? For even though I know that all that I see is just a reflection of what rests in me, And all that makes me boil over with rage, lies dormant in my body, my body’s like a cage. And I just wanna let it out And set myself free Make love to the moment so you can make love to me I just wanna let it out And toss it to the air God can absolve it, baby i’ll meet you there In the ever-present-holy-moment What can you tether down for me with all that you are as my Adam? So we can reach up and be the highest self that we can fathom. Baby I just know we can hold space for one another to explore our demons as they try to pull us under. Please don’t forget that the purest white light, lies sleeping in us even as we fight. We’ve just got to let it out And set ourselves free Make love to the moment so you can make love to me Just gotta let it out and toss it to the air God will absolve it and baby I’ll meet you there In the ever-present-holy-moment Oh what we could create there in the fire of all that we are as lovers. Reflecting on the fact that what’s lit up the sun, still, the darkness covers. And both depend on one another. And both exist because of the other. So we could walk around and talk and dance around in circles resisting the forces forever. But I just gotta let it out, And set myself free Make love to the moment So the moment makes love to me I just gotta let it out, and toss it to the air God will absolve it, and baby i’ll meet you there In the ever-present-holy-moment
5.
When you caught me eyes my heart made motions to hide. But you moved your body like a being brought forth by light. And the walls I’d built came tumbling down into the night. As the space we made made all things fake slip away. You’re my fairytale kinda dream boy. But I’ve learned not to pigeon hole the infinite. So as my mind’s eye tries to contain you, I toss the mental frames into the sky. To honour all you are the way the ocean Honours every wave as the divine. Strangers meet in the secret of the heart space Helps one lose his mind. Let the eyes be portals for answers to all that lends this life. Love and Light. Love and Light.
6.
My mind buzzes wild like a swarm of honey bees But I move like a withering willow. And right before my eyes, painted an expansive sky and i make it with my mind so i don’t have to chase it I don’t have to make it I don’t have to fake it Like i’m happy. Though I see a million ways to stretch out my sweet days my body wants to laze and make a dream of it Though I’m not short of plans Though i”m not short of ifs and ands though i’m not short of anything you asked me for My body likes to craze all those slow sultry days Days where nothing seems to matter. And I no longer strive to prove that i’m not going to lose the game that I have been placed in. My mind it likes to race Like a swarm of honey bees but my body moves like a withering willow Yeah I feel like a withering willow But the world outside is also in my mind And it goes both ways; its universal And there will come a time when we all will reach our line and turn back into that which made us sparkle I feel your subtle gaze and i know its just a phase but i ride it like a wave I am unstoppable And thought its just a haze and the days pass quickly I’m reminded that the sun is me when I read a story to me baby I thank you wisdom I thank you sky For all that you are For all that “i” don’t have to be.
7.
This is a song from your mother. The greatest Lover, The One Great Mother: I will always love you I will never tire When you’re feeling cold and blue I will be your fire And i’m not the kind of mother who gets annoyed I love you always You bring endless joys So you don’t have to try and prove What you’re worth For I gave you all my love When I gave you birth There is nothing Out There The isn’t in you already For when I chose my baby I birthed you ready So you can rest my child you can do no harm I will love you always I will be your mom I will love you always, I will quench your every thirst For I am the water and i will love you at your worst So you can sleep my little baby knowing you are just so fine You are my baby And your love is mine I will love you always I will love you always In all your colours. Go to sleep my little baby, there is nothing to arrive at there is nothing to achieve you are my baby and you’re living my dream
8.
Sun-Dae-ah 06:09
9.
Night Hawks 04:57
Oh how I’d like to know what it will feel like when I’m old. The fears and doubts and monsters in their grace Move like dancing little waves Across my ever moving little mind Only to find my starlight Only to find my own life Oh how I wish I were free Free of the confines of my body For though I may appear to be happy The beasts caw Like night hawks in my soul. There have been times when I have felt like nothing could hurt me as much as myself and there have been times when I have worried that that were true. There have been times when it has felt like a burden to be so beautiful and there have been times when it felt like my own strength was the true source of my feeling of never being enough Oh what it will feel like to be old To look back on the days I call now Will I remember the nightfall? Will I master my mind? All the ways to fuck up All the ways to give up Will never match all the ways to be enough
10.
Take a deep breath in. I ….. Have implied That I will die With my own life. And You…… Have told the same story over and over over and over….. but we’re all just dying. yeah we’re all just dying. So many shapes so many sounds and it’s just light waves. it’s just soundscapes Take a deep breath in Take a deep breath out Move yourself Dance about I have never been so confused and i have never been so true …. as when I let you kiss me as when I let you miss me And I pray I pray that you may know your own self as the God that you are.
11.
Aham Devi 08:52
Aham Devi Na Cha Anya Asmi Brahmam Aham Na Shoka Bhak I am not variant to the devi I am the brahman, not the polarized world.

about

Lullabies for Winter is a project I created over the winter of 2015-2016 while living in a cabin in the woods on Vancouver Island.
It is a work of improvisational experimentation in soundscapes and devotion. Each track is a unique expression of what it means to me to know Love. Varying from completely improvised poetry captured in single takes to sacred mantras explored free form in meditation Lullabies for Winter is a eclectic representation of both my inner heart and psyche. It spans the spectrum of my emotions, taking listeners deep into my darkness while simultaneously sharing the light of my greatest internal shine.

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released September 22, 2016

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Tamara Dawn Cobble Hill, British Columbia


Music from my heart.
Bringing Spirit into matter through Song.
Calling myself Home.
Om.

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